Saturday, July 14, 2007

Being Under the Ground

sentiment: a bit frustrated
harmony: "Water Me" by Bonnie Pink

I know this is going to be a rather dramatic post so to those who really don't like drama, I'd like to apologize but I'm not really in the mood to be happy right now. A lot of things happened before my last post, frustrating ones that is. Specially today, which serves as my Friday the 13th (although it's already July 14th). Another "History repeats itself" realization. I just remembered today how I was teased (with some hints of bullied) when I was in my younger teens. I got mad and cry instantly specially if it's really offensive and if it feels like I've been stabbed in my back with a knife but you won't die. Who wouldn't have been angry if you've been teased by boys right? Yes, the "gay thingy" but in the past it was more worst since kids are more bold and outspoken than adults right? But it's the same worst thing really even if it's not directly.

Earlier in my class, 2 boys (code name "x" and "y") really got into my nerve since they're really annoying even though they're saying they're just joking. Yeah, joking at least would make their day complete but they don't think before they speak. I don't if they're just papansin or just plain f**king idiots. When we were asked to form a group in our Industrial & Agricultural Marketing class, 3 students were chosen as leaders and I was one of the unlucky ones who was chosen by our professor. When she asked me who I wanted to be my groupmates, x and y suddenly butt in saying (actually they shouted and I find that annoying) that they don't want to be in my group. Ok fine right!? I didn't even have plans on taking them since they're such big idiots. Of course, being annoyed, I fought back and told them, "Who's forcing you? If you wanted to be with the other group, so be it!" I'm planning to say more but I don't want to have a fighting scenario there because grades matters first. It's a good thing, some of my close friends volunteered that they would be in my group and it was a big help really. Even though, they won't be reading this post of mine, I still want to thank them.

Then at Financial Management class, x is making some "poor" stomachache scenes pleading that he wants to defecate or something but when we got our 30-minute lunchbreak, he just pretended and said that he wanted to be hugged by me. What am I? An idiot? No way am I gonna do that. I'd rather punch him right in the face than do such idiotic acts! Then one of my close friends brought up that topic while we were eating lunch. I told them that I am really tired with their show and I really want to let them taste their own medicine but one of them said, "Just leave them be. You're not doing anything wrong to them right? I'm just wondering why they tease you..."

I fully agreed with what she said. I'm not doing anything wrong to them. They're the ones who started this junk talk show. Actually, I am just smiling or laughing when they're teasing but behind those laughs, I am really pissed off. I just wanted to remain cool behind those situations. Then it came to my senses that there's something not quite right. I have a feeling that they're planning to make me admit that I'm a homo. Probably, just by analyzing their pranks (I mean jokes). But they won't gain anything from this, I assure them. No matter what they do, I will see to it that I'll just remain silent since I know myself more than anybody else of them aside from my closest and best friends of course. Well who are they in my life right? They don't know anything about me so I just wanted to tell them to just keep their mouth shut and refrain from teasing bullying me. We're already in the adult stage so why act childish and do such annoying deeds? It'll be a waste, mind them.

To have a glimpse of what I am feeling now, try listening to this song. I've been repeating this song while I am making this post.



  1. I'm not quite sure if you already know my very abused line, but just in case...

    "Being ignored is worse that being alone. So if you hate someone, ignore him."

    Know what I think right now? I think they're just crushing on you because you're so adorable! *huggleglomps j00* Weeee~ Hahaha! They REALLY have NO IDEA! Don't mind them oni! We all love you just the way you are. :D

  2. "adorable" huh? :P the word doesn't suit me a bit.. >_< and "crush"? O_O as in *bleeep*?! *lam mo na un!*

    anyway, yeah being ignored is worse because some of my friends there tend to ignore me sometimes too specially when they're in a very smooth talk about something that they can relate (but I can't relate). Tinatawa ko na nga lang kanina kahit inis na ako eh.. x_X

    thanks imouto! *huggies*

  3. ohh.. my poor kpatid. I remember back in FEU I experience being tease because of some mistakes I did. I never wanted them to judge me.. but I kinda learned in FEU that if you dont study then you'll going to be tease.

    "that principle is actually in chemistry class."

    ANywayz.. just like what yummy said. Ignore them! They wont gain anything from teasing and laughing at your back.

    Just let them remember this thing~ "Study hard and you'll see who will get the last laugh!"

  4. thanks kapatid! but you know, they don't tease me because I don't study nor I'm a studious person. It's more like of a power trip that I don't really like. But thanks, I'm trying to ignore them to the best that I can. But still, my patience has its end. So I don't know when I can still hold on.

  5. Lol! Ignoring doesn't help really if they won't stop. I should know that more than anyone else...

    It's too bad I'm not around...

    *Some eerie dark aura encompasses around the room while a dark figure in a corner seeps in holding a bloody cutter on his right hand and laughing evilly*

    ...wha? It's just an English interjection! Bloody English...

  6. @Ueno>>well yeah.. like what I said, I don't know when I can still hold on... no matter how long my patience is, there's gotta be an end to it. That I assure them.

  7. hey hey I'm not bad as a criminal... but when the time comes that they really deserve to be punished, I'll definitely call my troops to form a Mafia... I swear them... xD I'll pound them to pieces with my ammos...xD lolz~